This Too, Shall Pass...
I am writing this in response to a blog I just read. It sounds as though she is in a whirlwind and she cannot quite find her way out. I am not quite sure how to respond so I am choosing to share a little bit about how I have been feeling lately. The funny thing is, I didn't even realize until last night how things have been piling up on me. Creeping one by one into my psyche trying to tear it down inch by inch are these evil little thoughts. It starts off by some random incident sort of like a spark that flies off of a campfire and disappears into the night. You never think of it again because by itself it is just harmless, but if you get enough sparks in one spot a slow smolder may start and before you know it you're reaching for the fire extinguisher. Honestly it is a little too dramatic for what I am feeling but lately I do feel a loss of control and a loss of faith in the things that a know. It seems a dark presence has crept into my comfort zone causing uneasiness. Perhaps I have been taking things for granted, a lack of appreciation for my blessings, maybe I have become too complacent. I have also questioned the mid-life crisis thing, (Are we there yet?) I have felt a disconnect and experienced lonliness. Lately my job, one that I have enjoyed for many years, has become the biggest anchor weighing me down. I have explored some different options for my future, but instead opening things up that road made me feel even more stuck. It could be this crappy weather, this extended winter that is dragging me down. Some times it is hard to know which feelings to give validity to and which to blow off.

The funny thing is while this heaviness has been worming its way in to my thoughts something else has been as well. It keeps popping up, a TV show, a book, overheard in a random conversation. It has been coming up often enough that it has come to the forefront of my thoughts. It is a simple saying, we have all heard it, it might even be cliche', but for some reason I have taken comfort from it. It is simple, "this too, shall pass." This can't go on forever, (except maybe this winter) regardless of the choices you make, for better or worse this is only a snippet in the big picture.

By the way I wore one sock inside out all day today, why does this matter? It doesn't so much except that my work pants are too short and my socks had cats on them (an effort to make the short pants fun.) I was so distracted by the hole in the toe when I put them on this morning that I didn't notice. This could be a metaphor: Don't be so distracted by the negative things that you mess up the fun things. (Like cats on socks) or something like that.